Not too proud to beg

We don’t like to beg. It feels like an acknowledgement of failure: that we are not able to take care of something ourselves. It puts us in a position where we are vulnerable, seriously dependent upon another person: a person whom we fear may not want to help us.

In today’s first reading, nearly the entire letter of St. Paul to Philemon, we have some serious begging going on.

The situation was this: during his time in prison, Paul learned that Onesimus, one of those he had converted to Christ, was the escaped slave of Philemon, a man who also happened to be one of Paul’s converts.

As I mentioned before, the Apostolic Church was not focused on overturning the evil institution of slavery: their focus is on spreading the Gospel as fast as possible and preparing people for Christ’s return. To this end, it was very important that Christians be seen as moral, law-abiding people, even to the point of Christian slaves being obedient to their masters.

As a newly baptized Christian, Onesimus’ path was clear: he must return to the master from whom he had escaped (and from whom he had perhaps even stolen). It was not a pleasant prospect: recaptured slaves were brutally punished and in some cases even killed.

Onesimus would have to beg for his life. St. Paul tries to help by writing this letter in which he too begs, pulling out all the stops in giving reasons why Onesimus should not be punished but rather accepted back as a brother in the Lord.

If St. Paul the Apostle is not too proud to beg, who are we?

To be sure, we should try to live our lives in such a way that we are the ones who give rather than the ones who have to beg, yet we can never let pride or a mistaken idea of self-sufficiency keep us from begging when necessary, especially when necessary for the survival of those for whom we are responsible.

Moreover, no matter how good we are, no matter how rich, how intelligent, or how popular, we must always be beggars, for we are totally incapable of attaining our own eternal happiness without the grace of God, we are completely helpless and vulnerable, we are utterly dependent upon God.

We are beggars. We must always be beggars. We should certainly try to accomplish whatever good we can, but we must always be begging from the Lord our God for everything our souls need.