Sometimes we just want to hide

Sometimes we want to hide our faith, to protect ourselves from conflict in an unchristian world.

Indeed, the saints whose memorial we celebrate today had reason to hide their Christian faith in a violently antichristian country.

On the other hand, sometimes we want to hide something shameful we have done, to protect ourselves from punishment or from a diminishment of our good reputation.

In today’s Gospel, Christ tells us
No one after lighting a lamp
covers it with a vessel or puts it under a bed,
but puts it on a stand,
that those who enter may see the light.
For nothing is hid
that shall not be made visible
nor anything secret
that shall not be known and come to light.

The men and women whose memorial we celebrate today had received the light of Christ. Some of them may have been more outspoken about their faith, setting it on a high lampstand for all to see. Others may have been more careful, but even so their light could not be hidden completely, and so all of them, the careful and the outspoken alike, suffered martyrdom.

As for those of us who want to hide because we are ashamed of what we have done, consider this:

First, I do not exempt myself from what I say here.

Second, shame is an appropriate reaction to sin (how sad that so many in the world no longer feel shame). If we feel we have to hide something we are currently doing, we must seriously consider the likelihood that what we are feeling is shame, that what we are doing is wrong, that we must repent, and that we must seek God’s mercy.

Third, if we have truly repented of something shameful that we have done in the past and have been forgiven, why are we hiding it from others? If our purpose is to protect our reputation, then what is more important: a façade of self-made virtue or the reality of God’s mercy in Christ? If our purpose is to keep the focus on the message of Truth and not on the messenger, how will the message be harmed when the history of the messenger becomes known? If our purpose is to protect innocent people who might be harmed by our downfall, how much worse will they be harmed when our past guilt is known?

This is not to say that all of us guilty creatures should immediately call and confess the sordid details of our lives to Dan Rather or to the scandal sheets. Nor is it to say that only the perfectly virtuous can spread the truth of Christ. Nor are we required to rush into a location where we can proclaim the Truth of Christ and be assured of instant martyrdom.

What we must do is be faithful: faithful to Christ and faithful to our penitent selves. We may be prudent and careful in what we say and do, but we must never say or do anything that contradicts the truth of Christ or the truth about ourselves. Whether we speak of sin or of virtue, we must always speak with acknowledgement of our personal sinfulness and of the undeserved grace we receive through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

If what we are holding onto is the grace of Christ, then “more will be given.” If what we are holding onto are our reputations in this world, then even what we seem to have “will be taken away.”

Lord Jesus Christ, son of the living God, be merciful to me, a sinner.